Witney bomb incident

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Report by P.C. Robert Sole

A loud bang was heard emanating from Pound Close, Witney.

A young blonde haired man was seen leaving the location of the suspected terrorist attack with his finger in his right ear and wriggling it as if to ease the irritation of short term tinnitus possibly due to a bomb related sudden loud noise. 

The Blonde haired man was heard loudly shouting (possibly over the ringing from his ears)  "that was da bomb! ". Crikey! Talk about incriminating yourself!

Another young man was heard saying "That was a blast." Possibly referring to the huge explosive device detonating. Or he could have been watching his dad's 1970s films about hippie music groups, or Starksy and Hutch where a "blast" in modern speak means "cool". Either way they are noisy bloody teenagers!  Then again the massive bang could have been the speakers on the HiFi blowing up. 

Upon hearing the young men talking about the "bomb" and "blast", the diligent neighbours called the bomb squad who quick as a flash raced to the scene after finishing their pot noodles.

                              THE OWNERS OF THE PREMISES ARE ON THE LAMB

The home owners are said to have fled the country and gone to Spain just like the bank robbers and top gangsters of the 1960s and 1970s.  Although reports are yet to confirm this as they might have just gone on their family hols. It's nice in Spain so that might be it.

If you have any information on this suspected terrorist attack, please contact:

P.C.  R.Sole 

pcrobertsole@witneypolice.com